My Baby...

I wasn't sure if I'd ever be able to write any more about this. I've had to come and go from writing this post for weeks as it just brings back the memories in waves of sadness and it is incredibly hard to remember and revisit, but ultimately I want to have a record of this time and after Andrew's post last week (here) I know it's time...

I was coming up for 5 months pregnant and had had three different scans (including an in depth one - because I am 'older' and at higher risk), seen her wiggle and move around and suck her thumb....we'd done a bunch of blood tests and everything had come back perfect, we'd narrowed down the name options to variations on the same name, and started planning life with a new baby. My kids were all just so excited. 

I was at a routine appointment. All by myself, no ultrasounds or "fun stuff" for anyone to come and see. My OB had asked how things were and I'd been so happy to tell him how the morning sickness had calmed down that week and I was feeling pretty great. He set up my next Ultrasound appointment and a couple of other tests. He'd checked the results of some tests/ultrasound I'd had the previous week and told me everything looked perfect and then he tried to find a heartbeat...and tried....and closed his eyes and tried some more. He said he thought he'd heard something but just to wait a few mins for the other room to open up so we could just do a quick ultrasound to be sure. I texted Andrew after he left the room..."he can't hear a heartbeat....trying not to freak out" and really I am not a freak out kind of person, I am always sure that every doctor is literally crossing every t and dotting every i just to cover themselves...or just ordering extra tests because, well, why not...

So I'm pretty calm and after a few minutes we move into the other room for the ultrasound. He puts the thing over my belly and says, "there's your baby" and I immediately felt that little happy relief...you know the..see, I knew there was nothing to worry about...one. Until the next words came a minute or so later...."but there's no heartbeat. I'm so sorry". And all the oxygen just sucked right out of my body. As he looked around with the ultrasound a little more I just willed a heart beat to appear. My head was spinning and I couldn't quite grasp what was going on. I know we had some surreal conversation about a silent miscarriage and booking a surgery and I had to sign some paperwork but I had this balloon of emotion getting bigger and bigger and I just had to get out of there. I finally made it through the front office full of smiling happy pregnant ladies and somehow found my way to the car through eyes swimming with tears. I called Andrew's number and before he even answered, the balloon exploded and I just started sobbing.

Somehow I made it home, driving through a river of tears that seemed would never stop and it wasn't until I got home that I even realized that I had never zipped or buttoned up my jeans after leaving the doctors. Meanwhile Andrew had left work and was on his way home to me. He arrived and literally we just fell into each other's arms and cried.

Telling the kids was extraordinarily painful. Abbie took it the hardest and just kept asking why, as she cried and cried. The depths of sorrow felt more like an overwhelming pressure filling my whole body and the room and the house, pushing out all the air until I could barely breathe.

The first friend to come to my door simply said, "don't say anything, I just want you to know I am so sorry" and hugged me and then left. It was as much as I could interact in that moment and I was unbelievably grateful that she would understand that need I had to be loved but the absolute inability I had to talk. And the friends continued to come one after the other, filling the space between the pain with love and comfort. I honestly felt so much love. It's the most bizarre thing to feel so loved in a situation that is so painful but literally I felt more loved than I have ever felt in my life before. I felt the arms of heaven wrapped around me just as strongly as I felt Andrew's arms and the arms of our friends, physically wrapped around me. I knew that God loved me and mourned with me and would not leave me to endure this alone, and I found that I had the most wonderful friends who literally served as angels providing meals and text messages, words of comfort, hugs and yes, many tears. I was never alone.

I spent the night before going to the hospital awake and in emotional turmoil. I cried and pleaded with Andrew not to have to go through with it. I couldn't let them take my baby out of me like that. But as morning came, we went through the motions and drove to the hospital, the same one I had driven by a hundred times in the past months thinking that that would be where our baby would be born. This was not how it was meant to be. At the hospital, everyone who came into contact with me kept asking me "what are you in here for"...I know that it's a routine question but at the time it was like a thousand daggers to my heart and with a literal stream of tears running down my face I would try and fail and try again to find the words to say, I'm here for you to take away my baby. 

We spent the next week or so in a haze of emotion and visitors. Andrew trying to have hushed conversations at the door and on the phone if I was sleeping, while enduring an agony of his own. He had longed for this baby for years and patiently waited until I was ready and it had hit him hard. I'd wake up in the night hour after hour with tears streaming down my face and often Andrew would reach over to me and hold my hand and I'd realize that he was awake and had tears of his own too.

I was just completely unprepared for this. Despite having some difficulties and complications during pregnancy with some of my other kids, I had had four kids just fine. It never really occurred to me that this could happen and it really was just such a shock. I'm sure all the pregnancy hormones just heightened the emotional response but it is one of the most emotionally and physically draining experiences of my life. I found it really hard to understand why and I wanted answers that weren't really there. I would stand in the shower or look in the mirror and was angry with this body that had betrayed me, the happy swollen stomach dissolved to an uninhabitable empty shell. I was angry with myself as a mother. How could I have been so oblivious? How could I have not known? How could I have been so happy when things were so wrong? What signs did I miss?

I don't know if I was mad at God exactly. I wanted to understand. I wanted there to be this big obvious reason. I wanted to know why I had to suffer, why Andrew had to suffer, why my kids had to suffer. I wanted to know why she didn't get to come here and be part of my family. I wanted to know why, despite such a big gap in my kids, it had felt so right to be having another - just to have this happen??, I wanted to know, just know for sure that I get to see her again, that she is mine, my baby girl, my child forever... I had so many questions that bounced around loudly in my head.

After a couple of weeks my lovely friend volunteered to go with me to the temple. It was beautiful and I cried pretty much solid for three hours. I had the words to this chorus go over and over in my mind and it truly felt like home to me that day, more than any other. I knew that my little Anna had somehow come there to meet me and I truly felt comforted.

"It feels like home to me...

It feels like I'm all the way back where I come from

It feels like home to me...

It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong"

After I got home, I knew I just had to stop. I had to stop thinking and questioning. I had to stop remembering. I didn't get all the answers I wanted but I had to let go of the questions in order to accept it. I didn't know if it was possible. I did know that I couldn't do it by myself, but somehow I was able to place all of these emotions and memories into a metaphorical box and close it up. I don't know for sure that that is the best way of dealing with things, but it is a way.

And it works. Mostly. Gradually I am finding that I can open the box and look around a little. I have finally been able to take out the handwritten cards and notes and be grateful. I can brace myself for certain conversations or situations and handle them without my heart ripping apart. And yet still there are times that the strangest most unexpected thing can just touch me with surprising force. I recognize that time truly does heal many a wound and yet, there may always be a trigger that brings a lump to my throat and the prickle of tears to my eyes. And I think that's OK with me. I don't want to totally forget. I want to have a tiny piece of my baby girl remembered in my heart forever. I want to be able to look at her scan pictures or hold a newborn baby without quite as much heavy sadness, or deep longing. And I think that I'm getting there.

I would not ask for this experience, but I recognize that I have also learned so much because of this experience. At first that actually made me mad. I didn't want to HAVE to learn these things THIS way. I didn't want a baby, my baby to die so that I could learn and grow and become a stronger, better person. But it happened. And I have learned. And I can't change a thing. All I can do is move on and live life and love my other kids and ultimately trust that God knows and understands more than I.

"I'm letting my fears go

Giving You control

For You are the one who holds me closer

in my souls darkest night

Everything I see is so temporary 

So help me run the race before me with eternity in sight

And I'm in Your arms, where I belong

There's no other place for me than right where You are

Some things just don't change

When I call Your name

You never hesitate to wrap me in endless grace

When I'm in Your arms

"God's light is real. It is available to all...It has the power to soften the sting of the deepest wound. In the furrows of despair, it can plant the seeds of a brighter hope. It can enlighten the deepest valleys of sorrow...

Even after the darkest night, the Savior of the World will lead you to a gradual sweet and bright dawn that will assuredly rise within you.." (Dieter F. Uchtdorf)

Andrew's birthday...

I'm not sure that his birthday was everything he envisioned it should be...it was kinda busy with lots of other things going on...but in between father's day last weekend (here) and his birthday this weekend...I hope that he got enough of a "we love you week" that he didn't mind too much.....

A little Father's Day Love.....

Hard at work....(they surprised him with the hat....and a ton of balloons that didn't make it into this picture!)

And after a gecko fundraiser event for Daniel...and getting him packed to leave, we opened presents on "Birthday Eve" so that Daniel would be with us for all the fun...

And then came the actual birthday day which was filled with things like taking our oldest off to the airport....(he was mortified that we'd even consider going through security with him to take him to the gate!) Bittersweet to see him go...!!

And another local gecko event somewhere in that day too..... we finally rounded it out by going out with the kids to wander around some stores (which inevitably led to the girls buying some clothes....how does that happen every time??)

And with a few ooohs and aaaahs over the beautiful moon, the day was over....

Another year older and wiser too.....Happy Birthday Andrew:) Love you xx

Girls Dance Recital.....

Well we'd been building up to this all year....practice, practice, practice, cute costumes, photo shoots, standing in that long line just to buy tickets to watch them (back here), hair & makeup, full dress rehearsal the day before
....and yet somehow.....we (meaning more of an "I" than a "we") manage to mess up on the times and instead of getting them there an hour early as I thought we were doing.....we ended up getting there right as the show was beginning....we were an hour off!!!  I don't think I'll win dance mom of the year award or anything anytime soon:)

 Luckily we saw their whole performance and all's well that ended well....right??

 Cute girls and love their teacher!!

Rowen Abigail Cheskin

My sister is busy having a baby right now.....literally right now. I am nervous and anxious and excited all at once for her. She is being induced 3/4 weeks early as the doctors are worried her baby hasn't grown for the last month and so there are lots of questions and a little worry intermixed with all the excitement of a new baby. I am checking my phone just about every two minutes for updates (like I wouldn't notice if got a text or a phone call....but just in case I missed it!!), could barely sleep last night and am having the worst "sympathy" period pains known to man...(well technically woman I suppose)....come on baby girl!!

So finally she arrived...2.02am (UK time!) on Weds 20th....with the time difference we actually found out on the evening of Tues 19th (which is a little weird!) Rowen Abigail...what an adorable little face:)

Anyway, all went well....gorgeous little girl weighing 5lbs9oz...I am just dying to go over and hold her! Why oh why is Scotland so far away and so expensive to visit???

Daniel's Boston Trip…of a lifetime!

Brandeis University Global Youth Summit on the Future of Medicine Global Youth Summit Board of Advisors    FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: Daniel O'Hare of Highland High School SELECTED AS DELEGATE TO THE GLOBAL YOUTH SUMMIT ON THE FUTURE OF MEDICINE Steve A. N. Goldstein, M.A., M.D., Ph.D., F.A.A.P. Chairman, Provost, Brandeis University, Former Chief of Pediatrics and Physician-in-Chief, University of Chicago Comers Children's Hospital Bruce Birren, Ph.D. The Broad Institute Co-Director, Genome Sequencing & Analysis Program, Director, Genomic Sequencing Center for Infectious Diseases Susan Birren, Ph.D. Dean, Arts and Sciences, Professor of Biology, Developmental Neurobiology Irving R. Epstein, Ph.D. Henry F. Fischbach Professor of Chemistry, Volen National Center for Complex Systems Professor, Howard Hughes Medical Institute Dr. Michael Freed Attending and Cardiology, Boston Children's Hospital, Associate Professor of Pediatrics, Harvard Medical School Dr. Eleftheria Maratos-Flier Professor of Medicine, Harvard Medical School, Director, Office for Academic Careers and Faculty Development, Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center Dr. Samuel O. Thier Professor of Medicine and Health Care Policy, Harvard Medical School, Former President, Brandeis University, Former President, Massachusetts General Hospital & CEO of Partners Healthcare  Waltham, Massachusetts – June 15, 2013 – Today, Brandeis University announced the final delegation to the Global Youth Summit on the Future of Medicine and has selected Daniel O'Hare to represent Highland High School and the state of Arizona at the Summit. "The next generation of health care providers will practice in an environment hard to imagine just a few years ago. Leading-edge science is rapidly changing the daily practice of health care" said Steven Goldstein, MA, MD, PhD, FAAP, Chairman of the Global Youth Summit; Provost, Brandeis University; and former Chair of Pediatrics and Physician-in-Chief of The Comer Children's Hospital at the University of Chicago. "We are in the midst of the most significant and fundamental change in health care delivery in our lifetime and young people who start now will be the future leaders in the field of medicine." Aligning with the Brandeis' elite admissions standards, only students with exceptional academic records and test scores as well as documented interest in a medical or health career were invited to apply.  Out of the hundreds of outstanding applicants, Daniel is one of only 175 delegates selected for the inaugural program.  According to Andrew Flagel, Senior Vice President for Students and Enrollment at Brandeis, "The delegation comes from across the country.  With cumulative un-weighted high school grade point averages of 4.1, I am very proud to be welcoming this incredibly talented, diverse, and passionate group of young leaders to Brandeis." Delegates to the Summit will gain unique, behind-the-scenes insight into the dynamic world of health care through experiential learning, guest lectures and networking opportunities with leaders and innovators in the global medical community in order to build upon their already significant abilities and chart their path to becoming leaders in medicine. Dr. Goldstein adds, "Soon it will be routine to order the complete map of each patient's genome, and the staggering potential of truly personalized medical treatments for both chronic and acute illnesses will be in our hands, as will be the responsibility for handling this powerful information in an ethical manner.  Brandeis is at the forefront of exploring these issues, and part of our distinctive mission is to produce leaders to repair the world." Delegates will hear from prominent Brandeis faculty members who are members of the National Academy of Sciences and Howard Hughes Medical Investigators.  The conference keynote will be delivered by Dr. Jeffrey Flier, Dean of the Harvard Faculty of Medicine, and additional feature presentations include Dr. Ronald Dunlap, President of the Massachusetts Medical Society and Dr. Elizabeth Phimister, Deputy Editor of the New England Journal of Medicine.  A full list of speakers can be found at http://www.brandeis.edu/youthsummit/speakers.html. Brandeis University, the youngest institution among the top ranked universities, was designed distinctively to offer exceptional students intensive transformative academic experiences with faculty on the leading edge of their disciplines.  A liberal arts college within a full research university, this model is fulfilled in an approach to the sciences that offers even first-year students the chance to be engaged in new discoveries. Contact: Andrew Flagel youthsummit@brandeis.edu 415 South Street Waltham, MA 02453 Ph: +781-784-2005

Today is Father's Day...

Andrew shared this with me....it was strange as I have been writing a post about the same thing and was just trying to find the courage and the right moment to post it. It makes me sad to read and yet, glad that it is a shared experience and that he cares and loves so deeply. I love you Andrew x

Today I woke up sad and a little reflective. We are reaching the moment where we'd be welcoming our little one into this world but it wasn't to be.  As Amelia brought her little cut out drawing to me along with a big kiss I couldn't help but think of what might have been - the first steps, the birthdays, the life events and yes, the Fathers Day's.

After a very difficult pregnancy with Amelia it took a couple of years of convincing and cajoling to finally get Victoria to take the plunge and that leap of faith to have another.  

Victoria was past the morning sickness and we seemed to be on the homeward stretch.  We'd even had an in depth scan from the geneticist were things literally came to life for me.  The reassuring cadence of the heart beat, the tiny little features and yes a little O'Hare stubbornness where baby failed to comply with the Sonographer - that's my baby I thought! We were told that our baby was a little girl and was fine and healthy.

About 5 months into the pregnancy I was at the office and I got a text message from Victoria, "I'm at the Doctor's office, he can't hear a heartbeat. Waiting to have an ultrasound". About a half hour later Victoria called and I answered and I could hear nothing, only sobbing.  I said something to the effect, "is the baby gone"? The answer unfortunately was a heartbreaking, "yes". Life went into slow motion and I got out of the office as fast as possible.

The next two days were difficult. I'd never really understood the grief displayed by others who had the misfortune of a miscarriage. Thoughts akin to, "why can't they just go ahead and have another?" or "why are they so upset?" were prevalent in my mind. How ill informed and insensitive I was to have had these thoughts.

There was no guide book for this but I knew at one point when feelings were a little less tender that I would need to give the fathers perspective on this, as the grief was real and painful.

As soon as I arrived back from the office I just held Victoria and we both shared many tears and not many words. There was the, "now what" and the disbelief and a few questions but the reality is that we went out and shopped for Victoria's Scout Court of Honor that afternoon, in some kind of need to keep hold of the 'normal' and waited to hear from the doctor on when we would go in to have baby removed.  With it being a Thursday we did not want to go through the weekend without the operation. Thankfully, Victoria was scheduled the next morning so we went home to wait for the children to come home from school to deliver the news.

By the this time my brother and friends were aware of the situation and wanted to help, bring meals and generally send their love to our family. My initial feeling was one of wanting to be alone and not have our mutual emotions out there for others to view. My advice now: open your door and your hearts to all that people have to offer, it is truly amazing to experience. I coined a term, "the first responders" for those sweet ladies, who in those painful early hours prepared their best meals and braved the raw emotion to give my sweet wife a long hug and a warm meal. It was a little slice of heaven where good people were, 'comforting those that mourn'. The flowers, the knocks on the door and the meals continued. They were a metaphorical, "keep going, it's going to be okay, you are loved".

We delivered the news to our children and more tears were shed. Our little Abbie, who had been so excited to play mom was so sad and let out her sadness with a very audible burst of emotion.  Amelia who had prepared lists upon lists of possible names was a little more pragmatic and Daniel and Jordan didn't quite know what to say, so hugs sufficed.

That night we prepared for the operation the next morning and went to bed pretty early. I had a very fretful nights sleep and at one point in the small hours of the morning my sleep gave way to the reality of the moment. So many thoughts went rushing through my mind.  What happens to our babies body, how is this little one to be remembered if we have nothing tangible after all these months?  The hopes, the dreams, the morning sickness, the reassurances, the cravings, the convincing, the excitement, the anticipation for what had fast become my literal daughter, gone. Nothing, not even a name.  In those moments Victoria awoke too and I expressed my sadness that we hadn't even decided on a name. Almost every name we had talked about (and actually agreed on) had been some version of Anna. I said I liked the name Anna and asked if she did too. And so baby became Anna.  I wanted to somehow be close to my baby so I laid my head on Victoria's stomach for what must have been a few minutes and had a special moment. I then kissed her stomach said my goodbyes and in that instant knew I had to get my emotions in check to be strong for Victoria. So that's what I did and haven't really dwelled on things much until this moment, writing this this, and it still hurts!

The procedure went as expected and Victoria made a full recovery.  

I just wanted to write for the other Dads out there - it's difficult but you will get through it.  It is hard to be a spectator and watch the one you love go through so much pain while still needing to remain strong for her and at the same time dealing with your grief. It’s difficult.

Time, friends, family, faith and getting on with life made things much better for us. Things are pretty much back to normal for me - I've just been reticent to peel the onion so to speak in the hopes of being strong for Victoria and have avoided some situations in order to not dwell on things. In those quiet moments thoughts undoubtedly percolate causing pause for reflection and “what ifs” but that is fine.  Our faith teaches of brighter tomorrows and that we will be reunited with our loved ones in the afterlife.  I pray that this is in fact the case.

One day little one, one day!  

Andrew

Father's Day Weekend...

Father's Day "weekend" started on Friday with a trip to the lake..... (ok so probably a little more fun for the kids than the "driver/father" but still how else would a good dad spend his time, other than helping his kids have a fun day...??)

(the boys planning how to survive the "revolution" tube!!) 

 Amelia opting for the calmer ride...

Miss Abbie (....Daredevil is her middle name...) is not one for going calm...and is on with all the boys!

Backflips, Frontflips....and jumps from cliffs (ok I'll clarify...one jump from said cliff before we freaked out and stopped all other jumping from cliffs...)

And some cute little ducks to round out the day....not that ducks have anything to do with father's day, but they are cute:)

And then the Father's Day weekend got a little derailed in between the garage getting cleaned out and other random chores....(but my garage is lovely and clean now!!)

Sunday got a little better...who wouldn't want an awesome jello cake??....

and a fun Father's Day at church...including a few laughs from the Primary Father's Day Program I put together....check out some of the kids comments!!

I loved one of the story's told at church...it was an experience from Daniel's High Adventure camp. They were whitewater rafting one day and the guide had repeatedly told them that the only rule was to STAY IN THE BOAT....well they turned the corner on one rapid and there was a huge log in their path, so it took a ton of maneuvering to try and make it past without flipping. As they finally made it, they realized that their guide wasn't in the boat any more. He was hanging off the side. They managed to pull him back in and he quickly guided them to the shore and jumped out. Everyone was a little surprised and then they realized he was running back upstream to warn the guys who were on their way down about the log.

Dad's aren't perfect. They make mistakes just like the rest of us and sometimes they fall out of the boat. But Dad's are always thinking about their kids, the ones who are coming downstream, and want to protect them from problems and guide them through difficult waters. That is a Dad's job.....

Grateful for the things I have learned from my dad...and really grateful for the awesome dad that Andrew is to our kids. I know they don't appreciate everything he does just yet, but one day they will....(right??)

Thanks Andrew. Hope you had a Happy Father's Day weekend. I love you x

Climb for Cancer 2013 - Update

In the summer of 2011, my dad fell asleep at his desk at work without realizing and not feeling great and thinking it a little strange, drove himself to the local clinic (where he was living in Romania). They found his blood count so low that they were surprised he could still stand. They gave him a life saving blood transfusion (which ironically gave him hepatitis which he would later, almost die from), and he was on the next flight to London, to try and figure out what was going on. He almost didn't make it through the flight and was rushed to the hospital upon landing. After some initial tests he was finally diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia.

He has found being ill challenging. I don't recall him ever being sick or going to the doctors in his life (although that could have been something more to do with his fear of needles). He likes to keep busy and lying in a hospital bed doesn’t really work for him. So he fought his way through septicemia, hepatitis (and every other infection that comes from being neutropenic), and into remission. 

Since he was forced to retire, he has been spending his time out of the hospital either at the bottom of his garden in “Grandad’s station” (aka a shed filled with the model railway he has painstakingly built), or riding his bike. He has always (much to our dismay as kids) been an avid watcher of the Tour de France which translated into so many hours of watching bikes cycle up hills, down hills, through rain and through sun (it goes on and on...and as a child I had no appreciation for the beautiful scenery!). 

This summer, he had planned with James (our eldest brother, who is the only one of us to catch the cycling bug) to follow the last few days of the race in France, and then cycle the final climb, the mecca of the race, Alpe D’Huez. For those not in the know that’s a grueling 9 mile, 3,670ft (height difference) on a 7.9% slope (for those of us who have no idea what any of that means...well it's not something you could do in fifth or even fourth gear depending on your car - which is supposing you have a car with gears! Just interpret as: it's hard, very hard!). 

Flights were booked, hotels were paid for, and training was well underway, but in April at a routine checkup, Dad was told that the Leukemia had returned. Dad’s first question was “will I still be able to ride in France in July?” Given the chance (if he could somehow sneak away from mum), I am sure he’d still like to attempt the mountain. The reality is, it’s just not possible. He is back in the care of Dr Robinson – working together to do what they do best – beat this thing. So far he has gone through one round of chemo (and came as close as you can come to dying from an infection), but still has Leukemia cells. He has just started on a second round of chemo. The hope is to push him into remission again and then try a stem cell transplant.

Dad can’t ride Alpe D’Huez (at least not this year). He is currently climbing different mountains. 

James sent us all an email back in April...

" Dear FamilyI had been planning a bike ride with Dad this summer in the Alp's. Given his training regime and discipline every morning, I think he was working on the principle that he was going to beat me up Alp D'uez! 
Given his recent excuse it looks like I will be going it alone, however Dad set me a challenge, raise money for Cancer Research! His oncologist is doing some very interesting and cool studies on fighting cancer and helping patients recover. 
I thought about what I could do that would be significant and challenging to help raise money. Something that for most people would represent the physical and mental challenge of fighting cancer. I thought about Dad and his determination to keep going and not give up, his want to keep fit and healthy which has enabled this latest round of chemo to go ahead. So I have decided that in the summer when I am over I will get up early every morning for 5 days and ride up 10,000m of climbs in 5 days."

So we came up with a plan.....Dad is going to beat the AML into remission for a second time, James is going to cycle the 10,000m of mountain climbs in just FIVE days and the rest of us are planning (much smaller) bike rides and runs and car boot sales and movie nights and bake sales and pretty much anything else we can come up with to help raise the profile (and hopefully, lots of money) for this life saving research in the hope that it can be the answer to beating AML for all the other dads, brothers, mums, sisters, kids everywhere.

We would appreciate any donation, or better yet, come and support any of our events this summer!! Check the facebook page and donation website for more info! Thank You!!

Jordan's drawings...

Jordan has kinda blown us away these last couple of months by coming up with incredible drawings...he's always been artistically talented (is that a phrase?) but he's kinda taken it to another level lately. He did the first one (snowboarder dude) while we were in Hawaii and I really had to ask if he had drawn it himself!! I don't know if he took that as a compliment or not!!

Having no artistic abilities of my own it is fascinating to watch him spend a couple of weeks transforming a blank piece of paper into an amazing picture!

While the boys are away,...

The boys went away last week on various High Adventure camps....

Mountain biking in Moab (Jordan and Andrew)

and White Water Rafting/Rappelling in Durango (Daniel)....

They made it back alive and well with plenty of stories to tell....and with a mountain full of laundry as a gift for me.

Meanwhile, me and the girls managed to enjoy ourselves with a little more low key, girl stuff...you just cannot go wrong with pool parties and plenty of ice cream:)